Thanks all for the kind comments to my whiny post, especially to oneofhismoms for the one about only really needing diapers.
We just got back from visiting my extended family out west. My family is spread all over the country, so my parents/sisters and our attendant spouses/kids make a concerted effort to all get together every year and a half. We had 8 grown-ups (two of us pregnant, my sister is due with cousin #5 in September!) and 3 kids under 4 coexisting pretty happily under one roof last week. We came home feeling surprisingly relaxed, despite Gail having to fight off yet another bug while we were away. Leigh absolutely loved spending time with her cousins/aunts/uncles/grandparents, regaling them with her songs and stories, putting my sisters' childhood dolls down for lots of "naps," and creating elaborate scenarios with matchbox cars with her cousins. We really wish they weren't all so far away the rest of the time.
We got back to our house on Sun at 6:30am after a red-eye flight. Leigh was a total trooper all night and when we finally got home, I asked if she wanted to sleep a little on her bed. She said, as is her usual response, "No, I don't need to sleep." Then I asked if maybe she wanted to lay down with me on our grown-up bed just to "rest." That was acceptable to her, so we both tucked in and within 2 minutes we were both out cold.
Before Leigh was born, I had some seriously overdeveloped fantasies about how fabulous cosleeping would be. I vividly imagined snuggling with our peaceful infant, who would of course later become an adorable cuddly toddler. We didn't even buy a crib before she was born. The reality of cosleeping in our family was not nearly as nice as my fantasies. As in, it was more or less impossible, and no one slept at all. We bought that crib a couple months later.
But apparently all I had to do to get my fantasy to turn out was drag our 2 2/3 y.o. across the country on a red-eye flight, because that morning nap was pretty much just like I had imagined. Leigh was snuggled up next to me, we were both sleeping soundly, and when we woke up 3 hours later, she just wanted to stay under the covers with me and talk about a million different things. That was the the first and may be the last time such a thing will happen, but I'll take it.
Parenting Right Now
3 years ago
5 comments:
This sounds so nice. I love the way you put this -- being the first and only time it will happen. That's so true!
i hope you guys share several more mornings snuggled in bed!
That sounds very sweet. Are you planning to try cosleeping again with the new babe, or are you going to go with what worked last time? I remember that we had all sorts of ideas about what we would do differently the second time around (namely, I did not want to end up being the only one of us capable of putting our baby to bed), and while it sort of worked out (for the first year, my wife was easily able to put our youngest to bed, without nursing), for the most part we really did do things exactly the same (and now at 28 months, I'm the only one who can put the "baby" to bed. Sigh).
We are a cosleeping family, though we never anticipated that cosleeping would last this long (our twins are now 6). I think our key to "success" (clearly, some would see the fact that our 6-year-olds still sleep with us as a LACK of success) is having a really big bed (three futon mattresses, pushed together on the floor). I am very curious to see how it will all work when our new baby joins the bed. Our six-year-olds have been sleeping snuggled up to my wife pretty much since early in my pregnancy with #3, and they are VERY resistant to the idea of "Mama" snuggling and nursing the new baby all night. One of them suggested that "this time, we should just get a crib," and the other questioned why I ("Mom") couldn't just keep on with being "the one who nurses the babies in the night." I think our sleeping situation will be the most affected by the gestational parent switch.
Funny--we had a different surprise re: co-sleeping. We were planning for the baby to sleep in our room for the first few months--but in her own bed. My husband was not big on the co-sleeping thing, and I was pretty freaked out by all the SIDS talk. As it turned out, our daughter had other ideas. She screamed when put down and would wake up if we put her down asleep. So, she ended up sleeping with us for most of her first six months and has continued to at least a few days a week ever since. (She's 16 months old now.)
So much of it depends on the kind of kid you get, I think. I'm interested to hear what happens with #2. :)
P.S. - Glad you had such a beautiful nap with little Leigh!
thank you so much for your encouraging words. im feeling better today and im sure it will come and go. i know we will be fine even if there are a few trips along the way. your family is beautiful, thank you for paving the way.
T
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