tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2818569792527986659.post6078481736932808594..comments2014-07-18T02:47:43.625-04:00Comments on First Time Second Time: "Is this your first child?"Lynhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11122162501533289888noreply@blogger.comBlogger6125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2818569792527986659.post-21498518692463540942009-07-20T07:34:48.930-04:002009-07-20T07:34:48.930-04:00I know this is an old post, but I'm just readi...I know this is an old post, but I'm just reading it now... I like the not-holding-the-baby deal, and perhaps we'll try it! As for the other, I actually wonder if it was perhaps their way of *acknowledging* Gail -- esp since you'd said she'd carried the first. I imagine that in mom-dad families, the dad gets asked next to nothing, if at all... ;) -- Emily from IVPEmilyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03280131961756230895noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2818569792527986659.post-64713328080177550712009-05-07T16:18:00.000-04:002009-05-07T16:18:00.000-04:00Thank you so much for this blog. I get so much ou...Thank you so much for this blog. I get so much out of your insightful posts and they always give me something to think about. My partner and I are expecting our first child in about a month and I've been infuriated at the way people direct all baby questions towards me (the pregnant one). I love your rule about answering the questions and I've told my partner to expect to answer all questions for now, since I'm currently the one holding the baby!KraftyKayhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07275548996899473536noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2818569792527986659.post-3353484745337096292009-05-02T22:59:00.000-04:002009-05-02T22:59:00.000-04:00Lena has been getting this question a lot, and alw...Lena has been getting this question a lot, and always feels as though she stumbles through her response. Sometimes she just says, "no, it's my fourth," which always makes ME smile, since it's just such a shocking thing for most people to hear. I always want to tell people that I'm expecting my fourth baby, especially when I get my daily "you have your hand's full!" comment. If only they knew about the invisible baby I'm expecting in 8 weeks!<br /><br />That is a great idea to have the not-holding-the-baby mom answer the questions. Come to think of it, I've completely forgotten about all those questions that come from nosy strangers when you've got a new baby. I think it's probably because I'm NOT getting them now as a NOT-PREGNANT person. Lena, of course, gets questions from strangers everywhere she goes. <br /><br />I'm sorry that you're having to spend so much of the final weeks of your pregnancy at doctor's appointments, but it sounds like the situation is in good hands.Lexhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07336953962925729151noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2818569792527986659.post-26908444180896975332009-05-01T18:49:00.000-04:002009-05-01T18:49:00.000-04:00between "the father" questions and the whole biolo...between "the father" questions and the whole biological mother situation, i can see how doctor's appointments can get stressful. it's weird that so many people make so many assumptions about other people's families. perhaps they may even think that you two weren't together when your daughter was born, so they are passing questions to the bio mother. <br /><br />i will say that we have tried out the mom who is not holding the baby answer the questions dynamic. it's still a little shaky for us, but i think it's a good approach. <br /><br />i'm continuously floored at the lack of awareness that comes from society in general but particularly the medical community. they need some serious sensitivity training!! i hope that you start seeing more and more nurses who can become familiar with your family before you deliver. we were lucky for the hospital i had the baby at to be so welcoming considering i had never paid them a visit in my life! hopefully this time will help them to clear things up and get out of their narrow minded viewpoints.gigglebluehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01496718846746524816noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2818569792527986659.post-63933665260123046952009-05-01T15:55:00.000-04:002009-05-01T15:55:00.000-04:00I often feel like I should be taking notes when I ...I often feel like I should be taking notes when I read your posts because you have such good ideas about operating as a two mom family in this world. I love the rule about the non-baby-carrying partner answering the questions. Once we're pregnant, I might just have to corner you and Gail on the streets of Boston and get you to tell us as much of your parenting philosophy as possible!<br /><br />It sounds like a good, though slightly uncomfortable, plan for Gail not to answer. Good luck!Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2818569792527986659.post-26675311520083656012009-05-01T10:26:00.000-04:002009-05-01T10:26:00.000-04:00I really like your rule about who ever is not hold...I really like your rule about who ever is not holding the baby answers the questions. I am going to talk to H about that... you would think think that when you say it is OUR second people would pay attention, espically since it is very clear that you are both actively parenting your second already. People make so many assumptions.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.com